The Integrity, I Owe Myself

I was listening to a motivational video on YouTube recently when one sentence stopped me cold:

“If you’re lying to yourself or not following through with yourself, you lack integrity with yourself.”

That hit a nerve.

The word integrity has always sounded solid to me—visually balanced, morally upright. As a creative, it even looks beautiful on the canvas. But when I sat with it a little longer, I had to ask: Do I really practice integrity with myself?

We often define integrity as doing the right thing when no one is watching—being honest, acting according to our values, and following through on what we say. I’ve prided myself on showing up with integrity in my business, in friendships, and as a parent. I keep my word, I follow through, and I do what’s right.

But lately I’ve realized something. In the quiet moments—when no one’s watching—I don’t always give myself that same respect.

How many times have I said, “I’ll start tomorrow,” “It’s just one time,” or “This doesn’t matter, it’s only me”? Those are still broken promises. And they chip away at the most important relationship I have: the one with myself.

So, I’ve decided to change that. I’m working to rebuild my self-integrity, one step at a time. Here’s how:

1. Keep the small promises

   
   

   Drink the water. Make the call. Start the painting. These tiny acts add up—and tell your brain: I matter.

2. Stop negotiating with excuses

   
   

   When I hear the familiar voice of “later,” I catch it. I lean in instead of backing out.

3. Set fewer goals, but actually do them

   
   

   Overwhelm leads to avoidance. I’m learning to choose a few things a day—and do them!

4. Speak to yourself with respect

   
   

   If I wouldn’t say it to a friend, I’m not saying it to myself. Period.

5. Celebrate every follow-through

   
   

   Each kept promise builds trust. And that trust? It’s everything.

This isn’t about chasing perfection—it’s about creating alignment. Real integrity doesn’t just live in our relationships with others. It starts in the quiet space within. And I’m finally learning to honor mine even if it’s a slow or bumpy ride.